The year is 2014, my 4year old daughter and I are sitting amidst a crowd of other kids and their parents at a 1 year old birthday bash. It is one of those big ones-bouncy castles, costumed clowns, and so on. We are coaxed through a collection of entertaining outdoor games often involving both the kids and us parents. One of such games has just ended and its time for a well deserved break. Signaling a time out the funky looking DJ begins to blast out a catchy R & B tune from his music corner. Many of the kids ran to the open space and started displaying dancing skills as they wriggle and gyrate to the hip-hop beat of music. Most of us parents were really enjoying it as we bob our heads in tandem with the rhythm. To a lot of people who are familiar with the scene the answer is yes, so what’s new? Moving on, as my ears tune in deeper and deeper to the funky tune, realise the theme of the song is primarily the sexual conquest of several attractive young ladies by a happening posse of virile young men. As the male artiste rap about their exploits, I notice the lyrics are peppered with swear words and heavily salted with obscenities. I begin to feel a little warn under collar, I look over to the children dancing and singing the song, wondering if they can hear what I hear. Most of the little girls at this time have started shaking their little backsides in ways that were not possible in the past unless you are at least 16 years. By now i became worried so I went to discuss with the party organiser, who was no where to be found. As for the DJ he was only doing his job and can not be bothered about the choice of music played on a 1yr party. At this point,is when it done on me that parents need a forum through which they can be enlightening about the negative media exposure we expose our younger children, so Harriet what do you think? (Amaka U. Lagos)
First of all, I am assuming we can all agree for the sake of discussion that in recent times, particularly the past decade there has been a sharp increase in the amount of negative media that is available to our children in this country. Like our western counterparts, we have also begun to pay the social price of technological development. Increased access to the internet and digital satellite television has provided us with not only a broader information and educational material base but unfortunately also more explicit displays of violence and pornography. Along side these is the increase in those musical artistes whose sexually demonstrate and often violent lyric have in recent years been able to crossover into mainstream popular music such that the rule the radio waves and are given much more airtime than they would have been a decade or two ago. I do not presume to have the monopoly of wisdom on this issue. Nor do i claim never to have been party in some way or the other to problem. having issued that disclaimer let me candidly say that i see at least two clear failings on our parts as parents which i will highlight now; firstly it would appear that many of us are reluctant or could not be bothered to exercise our natural right and duty as parents to censor what our children watch or listen to, in order to protect them. Often times we turn a blind eye and let them watch or listen to whatever tickles their fancy. Parental guidance regarding television viewing is probably where we score the lowest. For one thing we frequently do not take cognizance of age restrictions on TV programs and movies, often allowing our 6/7 year olds and even younger to watch PG13,16 and even 18-rated programs, lazily wanting to believe that their content will be ok and not too adult to cause concern when this is often far from truth. Moreover, we often make erroneous conclusion that once there are no sexually explicit scences the program is safe for viewing by children. We conveniently forget that there are at least 2 other important factors that inform age restrictions and ratings, namely violence and language. Should we wonder why our little boys often embarrass us with extraordinarily violent outbursts and our little girls sometimes suffer split personalities, where they are daddy’s little angels at home and something else outside. Whilst I certainly do not wish to over simplify the issue of bad behavoiur in our children which no doubt has varying causes, it would be equally naïve to suggest that what we allow them to watch or listen to has absolutely no bearing on their attitude. Children are the consummate imitators of what they see and hear around them. As a matter of fact, part of the solution is clearly for us parents to step up to the plate and put in much more effort than we are doing presently, to actively censor our children’s exposure to negative media. Some cable do have parental control facility- check with your service provider on how to active it. Mind you TV is not only concern. Radio and internet are also potentially rife mediums through which our children gain access to pornography and bad language.
