Ways to manage family relationships during recession (1)


Dear Harriet, your column is very practical and real to life, thanks for the good work. I am married with children the situation of things at the moment in my home is not going well due to the economy situation in the country and this is affecting our relationships. Please I need your counsel on what to do. Thanks. (Name with held, Uyo.)

 Thanks for sharing your situation, there is no better time to give counsel on the effect of recession on families and ways for families to cope at this crucial period that is affecting all than now that we are face with the reality. Trust me, you are not alone the situation of things in the country is not limited to a particular sect, or family instead every home rich or poor, every sector is affected, the rich also cry. The high rate at which  bread winners male or female are losing their jobs while some of those with jobs are on reduced salaries with the increase in cost of living is alarming as a result families are face with a lot of challenges. The high level of pressure everywhere is affecting the general well being of individuals, for instance a man who lost his job is likely to be stress out with worries, not knowing where and how he is going to cater for his family, even the one with a job is not certain about his tomorrow, such a person at home may start exhibiting some characters or attitude that were never shown and in most cases they vent their frustration or anger on their spouse and children, which ideally is not proper.  If this situation is not manage very well, might lead to  increase in alcohol intake, drugs, verbal or physical abuse, mood swing, depression, sleepless nights, fears, anxiety, high blood pressure, mental health, and suicide attempts. Suicide attempt is one aspect that is getting ground in our society today because a lot of people are not turning to the right channel in dealing with challenges, actually visiting a counselor or a therapist when face with challenges to pour out your heart (an outlet) is yet an aspect that is not really embraces by a good number of people. The thought of committing suicide not to talk of doing it has never been our thing, it was consider an abomination but today we hear and read of people taking their lives and the question is why? God our creator is the owner of life therefore nobody has the right to take his or her life. One thing we must understand is that whenever God plants a challenge in our lives, he gives us the right tools to use in order to overcome the challenge, remember as human  on earth there will always be one problem or  another but only with the right attitude and patient trusting in God can victory be sure. However in a time like this, understanding problems that can hinder or prevent people from achieving effective personal functioning is very important, when people visit counselors most times they are aware of a number of problems that are causing them difficulty, these are describe as presenting problems but due to the complexity of human nature frequently there are more problems, deeper issues that makes a person’s life a bit complicated so situation like recession strain might actually trigger violence or abuse, some people are very aggressive these days.  In addition the way  men and women deal with crisis are different, men regard job loss or no income as a major effect on their identity, this takes a great effect on their personality while the attitude of women are  totally different, the seek alternative immediately. The family relationship suffers a great blow once situations are not mange properly. Parents or guardians who are worried about their financial stability for example, often don’t have the patience to reason with children or respond to misbehaviour appropriately. The feeling of frustration can lead to unnecessary nagging, absent-mindedness, harshness to love ones, making a person unapproachable for discussion. Every responsible man want to provide for his family no matter the circumstance so the feeling of not been able to take up his responsibility effectively can steer up inconsistent behaviour. Recession is a phase that will not last forever but the effect on family relationships afterward is of great concern that must not be neglected. To be continued

Take care of yourself and each other.


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Harriet Ogbobine
Mrs Harriet Ogbobine is an educator, professional social counsellor and motivational speaker who has worked (and still working ) for various organisations and attended various courses on life issues: relationships, work, family, crisis and stress management, healthy lifestyle among others. She has worked for Good Counsel Network UK as a social welfare and publicity counsellor. Counselling Coordinator for DoctorsHealthInitiative. Mrs Harriet Ogbobine is the principal consultant of IGGI POP Nig. Ltd, A facilitator for Ministry of Women Affairs Poverty Alleviation Lagos State, magazine ( Today's Woman) The Nation News Paper Columnist Mrs. Harriet Ogbobine has conducted very numerous and regular motivational talks and counselling in various sectors both in Nigeria and the UK over the years. She is the Family, Relationships and lifestyle residence counselor for family Life, Saturday call in live show on Top radio 90.9FM at 9.30- 11am and co host/counselor on I Need A Partner live call in show on NTA2 which shows on DSTV 369,GOTV114, STARTIMES 104, every Friday at 10pm with a repeat same time on Saturday. She has featured on various Tv talk shows and heard on various radio stations. with her work experience over the years helping people with life issues especially those experiencing one form of abuse or the other for easy understanding and clarity, in passing the necessary message across to the grassroots, she relates in English, Pidgin English, Yoruba, Ibo, and Edo as the case may be. Contact: 08054682598 Instagram; HarrietOgbobine Twitter; @bineharrietj Ogudu GRA Lagos Nigeria
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