In continuation with last week edition on the above topic here are more useful tips that will be of great assistance to those who have been out of relationships for a while and people who are of age that at the verge of going into a relationship for the first time. On the previous edition we mentioned the followings; making your first date short and casual, letting go of the past, personal space, getting a life and avoiding unnecessary jealousy. This review is necessary for readers who are joining us for the first time. Total dependent can put a strain on your relationship; always depending on your friend or partner can affect your relationship. When you keep asking from a person all the time, let’s face it we are human it will get to a point where the person cannot take it any longer. The effect is that less attention or avoidance will then set in because of the constant demands.  Relationships strive when there is a level of independence, a situation where you don’t solely relay on your partner or friend for everything. It will interest you to know that most of the mail I receive from those seeking relationships or life partners have financial independent as the common requirement in demand. This goes to show that majority do not want liability, beside it pays a lot to be empowered no matter the situation. Next is to try as much as possible to know your place; it is very important to know and maintain your position in a relationship. Some people misinterpret certain actions to suit their personal intension without seeking proper clarification. Avoid playing the role of a wife or husband until you are declared one. In addition, un realistic expectation cannot be left out when mentioning mistakes in relationships; expectations are good but must be discussed together after all everybody goes into a relationship for instance with some level of expectation depending on individual needs but the challenge is when such expectations are not actualize because of the fact that they are not practical, this can affect the relationship. Knowing the warning signs; the signs are always there when the relationship is no longer the same but in most cases people term to ignore the signs by not addressing issues arises.  Numerous indicators can warn that a relationship may be heading for the rocks or at least for some sandbars. Avoid taking things for granted and be observant. Many get carried away without taking note of certain details. It is always proper to use your head in matters of the heart.  However, setting of boundaries must not be neglected in avoiding mistakes in relationships because boundaries define who you are, it reinforce the fact that you are different and unique from others. Boundaries explain what you think and feel, as well as what you are ready to tolerate. They also define your preferences, your likes and dislikes. Most importantly boundaries help you determine for what you are and are not responsible. A healthy dating relationship requires good, solid, and well defined relational boundaries. Lack of patience for the relationship to take its natural course; taking it slowly allows you to get to know each other better with time. Most relationship can be classified into four stages; the initial stage is the period when you are simply testing the waters to see if you like the person or not then next is regarded as the infatuation stage this is the time you are madly in love with the person and absolutely blind to his or her faults this can drag on for a long time, everything is happening so fast. Thirdly is the stage of reality bite, which occurs when you suddenly discover that your perfect friend or partner is not that perfect after all. Finally is stage where you are caught between staying and maintaining the relationship in order to advance to the next level or let go of the relationship and move on. Therefore with a clear understanding of the various stages gives the ability to take things easy by allowing the relationship grow at its own pace without rush.  Trying to change your friend or partner to suit your specification is always a big mistake; our personalities are different so in a situation where you go into a relationship with the mind set to change the other person is not a good idea because you can only change yourself not your friend or partner but Knowing and accepting the fact that everybody have their strength and weakness is a better approach instead. Don’t try to change them rather learn to accept them for who they are. Being too desperate to get into a relationship; this is a major and universal mistake especially for those who feel that time is running out, biological clock is ticking fast as a result they panic and are ready to settle for any one so long they are in a relationship. Wanting a relationship is just not the same as waiting to be in a relationship with a special person. Finally putting the above points into consideration will help your avoid certain mistakes in order for your relationship to run smoothly and for your protection from the pain of contemporary dating pitfalls. As a result you will be on your way to building a loving and lasting relationship. Take care of yourself and each other. Remember problem share is a problem half solved.
